Where to start? I literally just joined BabyCenter and was posting, commenting, and reading what others had to say or ask. Then I came across a post that had asked us to light a candle in memory of those who have lost their babies – either through a miscarriage or stillbirth.
No mother or father deserves to go through the pain of the loss, and no innocent baby deserves to lose their life. Sometimes, the world just isn’t fair.
As I lay here writing this post, I can’t help but feel the most overwhelming sense of appreciation and gratitude that laying next to me is my healthy baby. I can’t even begin to understand the anger, disappointment, dispair, grief, and pain of losing a baby. I almost feel a sense of guilt that we were so fortunate to be able to leave the hospital with our baby, when others are not. But I can promise you one thing for sure, that I won’t take a single day with my son for granted.
Never again will I complain about the pain or discomfort of breastfeeding or body issues, postpartum pains, or how tired I sometimes am. It definitely puts things in perspective and we are so incredibly fortunate to have a wonderful son to bless our lives.
I hope this post doesn’t offend anyone, (because, who am I to be writing about a topic I know nothing about, and can never truly understand), but I hope it does bring awareness to those who are lucky enough to have a healthy baby. I hope it makes people feel thankful for what they have, and to be empathetic towards others, like the way I felt after reading that post on still birth. Infant loss could happen to anyone. I hope this post makes people think about what could’ve been, and to appreciate every moment they have with their kids.
Tonight, and every night from now on, I will hold my son a little longer, hug him a littler tighter, kiss him and tell him I love him more often.